What Are Your Patterns?
Memory is the diary that we all carry about with us.
Oscar Wilde
How many of you have recently reflected on your childhood? Do you smile fondly with joy? Do you frown sourly with resentment?
Those memories, however we feel about them, are imprints that help to make us who we are and influence how we interact and react with others and ourselves. Most of my childhood memories are hazy with just a few sharp memories coming through. For the memories that have followed me into adulthood, I sometimes wonder how accurate they are—are they memories? Memories of memories? Am I truly remembering things as they were? How are those memories affecting my behaviors?
It's important to reflect and unpack your past because it can give you so much insight into your patterns—behaviors and thoughts that you repeat with little to no thought. I have patterns—some that have been wonderfully helpful for me and others, not so much.
At work and in my personal life, for example, I tend to go into a beast mode level of planning. It can be for anything; something as simple as a trip to the park or errands for the weekend. Planning gives me a sense of control, a sense of covering all of my bases which helps me guard against the unexpected. I know that this behavior comes from the seeds of discipline and focus that were foundational in my upbringing.
Being a planner in my professional life has been a wonderfully valuable skill. In my personal life; however, it can be a bit much for loved ones who aren't so structured. If I’m truly honest with myself, I can admit that my level of extreme planning is not really needed most times and can be lovingly annoying to my friends and family.
Regardless, it is important to recognize what you repeatedly do so that you can be aware. And with awareness comes the ability to regulate and adjust to your environment and the people you surround yourself with.
What do you repeatedly do and are any of your patterns worthy of a deeper look?
Aji