Our Problems Aren’t That Special
We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.
We all have problems.
Whether you perceive them as big or small depends on your unique life story and perspective.
In a weird way, there’s something comforting about identifying with your problems: Going to bed at night and snuggling with them. Waking up and having coffee with them. Showering and taking them with you to work. Good, bad, or ugly, you get to keep them and you know they will be there to help you fall into a place of uncomfortable comfort. They become familiar and dependable.
The feeling that your problems are special and that no one else can even began to understand what you're going through can become a crutch.
I’ve found that when you open up and start to talk to people (the right people of course), you can oftentimes realize that your problems aren't as unique as you think they are. This doesn't take away from your issues or make them any less painful. It just removes some of the ego and the focus on yourself as a passive victim.
That’s the magic of support groups, therapy and even online forums. You start to realize that even the most nuanced problems(in one form or another) have happened to someone else along the way. On any day, you can hear the negatives about social media and although those platforms have created some unique societal problems, they have also been transformational in bringing people together from all over the world to share their experiences, whether positive or negative.
We’ve all fallen into the rabbit hole of wallowing in our sorrows and thinking there’s just no way out. But, I can attest to the power of talking only to find out that you’re not alone and that there are paths to offloading your burden.
Talking things out almost always helps because it brings a different perspective and can help the transition from identifying with your problems, to seeking solutions. You start to realize that your problems don’t make you who are and although they're painful, they are not as insurmountable as you once thought.